Recipe for a Military Marriage

So I, like many other wives (young and old), spend so much of my time googling things military related. Well a few months ago I was doing my regular googling and stumbled upon this real cute saying-type thing so I thought I would share:

Recipe for a Military S/O

1 ½ Cups of Patience

1 Cup of Courage

¾ Cup of Tolerance

Dash of Adventure

1 Pound of Ability

To the above ingredients: Add 2 tablespoons elbow grease and let stand alone for one year. Marinate frequently with salty tears. Pour off excess fat and sprinkle ever so lightly with money then knead dough until payday. Season with international spices. Bake 20 years or until done. Makes unlimited servings. SERVE WITH PRIDE.

Like I said before, I thought that was really cute. As I read it a few times I began thinking, “What is my marriage made of?” So here it goes…

4 ½ Cups of Strength

5 Tablespoons of Sarcasm (more may be added if necessary)

3 Cups of Patience

1 Teaspoon of Independence

1 Teaspoon of Worry

Mix the above ingredients together vigorously and let set for 3 months in refrigerator. Sprinkle love over mixture until coated thoroughly. Bake at 425^oF for 5 months. Let cool for 3 days.

Serving Size: Unlimited

(Caution – May cause frustration if over cooked.)

That last part made me laugh. Anyways, let me give a small explanation of what the numbers in there mean... 3 months is how long he was gone in Great Lakes (during winter), 425^o is our wedding anniversary (April 25th), 5 months is how long we have been married, and 3 days is how long it took me to get from California to our new home in North Carolina.

Enjoy.

ABC’s

So I know it’s been a few days since my last post, but I haven’t really had anything interesting happen for me to write about that is exactly relatable... Lame, I know. Well anyways there are about million different things that I want to bring up in my blogs, but usually there isn’t enough to write about that specific topic so here are the ABC’s of military life…

A – Acronyms (Ahhh!! There are way too many of them.)

B – Ball Season (So exciting. I can’t wait to get all dressed up and see my hubby in his dress blues.)

C – Communication (I can’t say this one enough.)

D – Dress Uniform Inspections (Absolutely love these, the only times I get to see my husband in his dress blues/whites.)

E – Exchange (there are always about a million people there, I guess that’s why I NEVER go..)

F – FRO (Family Readiness Officer, we all know how helpful they are.)

G – Gossip (It never ends, military wives are just like high school girls no matter the age.)

H – Hurry up & Wait (Self Explanitory.)

I – Iraq (Somewhere I hope my husband doesn’t go anywhere soon...)

J – Jury Duty (Never again! Haha)

K – Kill, kill, kill (Not ever soldier thinks this way, idiots.)

L – Leave (We can’t get enough of this.. My favorite time of the year)

M – Moving (having strangers come in, pack, and hope everything makes it to the new duty station in one piece)

N – Naval Base (I hope we go to one next, I’m not too fond of Marine Bases.)

O – OPSEC (Learn it & Abide by it. )

P – PT (Again, it never ends..)

Q – Quitting (It is never an option)

R – Relax (I think this is all my husband ever wants to do when he comes home from work, I try my best to let him do this but we all must make sacrifices.. bahaha!)

S – Skype (Our relationship savior, got us though a few months and made things so much easier.)

T – Trust (The foundation to every military marriage, in my opinion.)

U – Uniforms (They just look so yummy in their uniforms, it gives me butterflies every time.)

V – Vulgar (Need I say more? Not uh..)

W – Waiting (As a military wife, we are always doing this. I know I will never get used to it.)

X – Xanax (A LOT of military wives should be on this.. I sure know a few.)

Y – Yellow Ribbons (I absolutely love them)

Z – Zip It (A true S/O knows when to just shut their mouths and listen)

Friends.

Okay well I’m just going to warn you now there might be some inappropriate language in this blog because this subject really pushes my buttons and gets me fired up…

So last week I was on a spouse-run support Facebook page for the base that my husband and I are currently at (which shall remain nameless)... well I was reading down the page and my eyes happened to land on a particular post where a fellow wife asked something like this: “Do you think it is wrong for me to not allow my husband to have female friends? Am I just a jealous person? I’m so confused here...”

Well there were all these replies from other wives saying things such as, “I don’t allow my husband to have female friends unless they were my friend first,” “No! You are so right.. my husband has no business having female friends other than me,” and the one that really got me was “I’m not allowed to have male friends and my husband doesn’t have female friends, it just isn’t right. We trust each other.”

I so did not comment on that one because as I said above I get fired up about it and would probably have said some not so nice things. How are you going to tell a grown ass man who he can or cannot be friends with? My husband doesn’t personally have a lot of female friends, but if he did why would I have a problem with it? He comes home to me. He married me. He loves me… seeing a trend here? I would sure hope so.

Then ironically, a few days later I was having a conversation with a wife who said she had told this to one of the husbands, “I’m not friends with you, I’m friends with your wife… I’m just nice to you.” Really now? Come one lady, get a grip. Again, no comment was made for obvious reasons.

I was later told that it really isn’t right for a military wife to have other male friends, besides their husband’s friends and this is what I will bite your head off for saying to me.

As I said in my little introduction my husband was gone to EOD school for over four months and within those four months I was always hanging out with my guy friends (which most happened to be sailors themselves). They were there for me when I was having those really bad nights, when I just plain missed my boyfriend/fiancé (at the time) – they could relate to my situation, they helped me with homework, they were my shoulder to cry on, and my person to vent to (which I did a lot haha).

I am going to say this once and only once, THEY WERE NOT TRYING TO GET IN MY PANTS or vice versa. They were good friends, I would even consider them BROTHERS! I know there is a HUGE stereotype that military wives/girlfriends/fiancées cheat when their S/O is gone which so isn’t true (yes, I know there are plenty of exceptions) but not everyone does it. A lot of people say that when it happens, it’s usually with a friend, but these guys were my friends before I met my S/O and they will continue to be no matter what.

I am a grown ass woman. I am perfectly capable of choosing who I will be friends with and who I will not be friends with, I don’t need your opinion to do so.

Get the picture? I will not change my view because certain wives have sticks up their butts so far that it pushes their noses into the air. (that made me laugh a little when I typed this.)